24 Ways to Initiate Dirty Talks for Long-Distance Relationships

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“In a relationship, trust is incredibly sexy,” she finishes. If you’re looking for ways to turn up the heat in the bedroom, dirty talk is a foolproof method. When done right it can get you more turned on and lead to more intimacy with a partner. But let’s be honest, it’s not about doing it right it’s about being comfortable with however it happens. However, while dirty talk can come naturally to some people, for a lot of us it can be super nerve-racking.

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• When your partner is off at work or running errands, drop some hints about how much you want to play later on.
• Dirty talk is a liberating experience for women to break down this mindset and become comfortable in their sexuality and desires.
• It’s worth noting that some people genuinely enjoy and prefer silence during sex, and that’s okay too.

Chances are, at one point or another, you’ll say something incredibly dumb, and that’s fine. Part of the appeal of talking dirty is the anticipation of what’s to, well, come. So describing exactly what you plan to do to your partner before you actually do it helps to build up sexual tension.

How to Talk Dirty (and Not Feel Like an Idiot)

Test the waters.If you aren’t sure that your partner will be into dirty talk, try it once or twice casually during sex to see what their response is—you might be surprised. “Because dirty talk can increase arousal, it can also make an orgasm more intense,” says Buehler. Talking dirty on the phone is a fantastic way to have some kinky fun with your significant other on the phone or even to move into all-out phone sex with your lover. You may feel a bit silly or intimidated at the thought of talking dirty on the phone, but once you adjust your mindset and let loose, you’ll be on your way to making your phone partner helpless with pleasure.

But while porn stars may have no qualms about uttering filthy phrases during sex, many of us regular folk tend to blush at the mere thought of saying such words out loud. Even the phrase “dirty talk” sounds shameful or bad. Talking dirty is a great way to connect with your lover and to kick things up a notch in the bedroom. To master dirty talk, you just have to slowly get more comfortable opening up verbally in bed (or if you’re sexting, over the phone).

“Another part of the explanation is that wanting to be called demeaning names is a form of masochism—the act of deriving pleasure from pain,” Lehmiller explains. But that said, even though you’ve had this discussion, and even though you KNOW it’s safe to take the leap, your mind will still try to keep you back from stepping out into the unknown. Other people like being called “you whore” while others prefer “my whore” while others still would never want you to call them anything close to the word whore during any of your lovemaking, ever. It’s supposed to be fun and comfortable, not intimidating. This discreet newsletter will teach you how to make him cum hard, give freaky oral sex & make him scream your name in bed. Imagine saying, “I want to stimulate your mammary glands with my oral cavity.” It’s accurate—but far from sexy.

In our verbal fantasies, commands rarely serve the same function they serve in ordinary conversation, especially in pornography where the enthusiastic obedience of the passive partner utterly negates any need for orders. For many people, the thought of talking dirty during sex can be especially daunting. There are also audiobooks available spotlighting many of the best erotic stories today, too. Check out The Best Women’s Erotica of the Year, Vol 5 and narrated by erotica writer and editor Rose Caraway.

I have never felt so useless until I met her and realised she does more work than most of us put together. Naomi is an exceptional Mum, Daughter, Friend and Voice of Reason. Speaking to Naomi in this episode is just a tiny insight to what she actually does day to day. Apologies for any audio cracks and bad quality video footage within this episode. This may be a special concern if your partner is a woman, as they’re often dealing with expectations not to be confrontational or hurt other people’s feelings.

Unfortunately I don’t do it as much as I would like to but I find myself having a better time when it’s involved. While I love dirty talk, I don’t exclusively rely on audio erotica, though I have listened to it in the past. Now I just use those memories along with my imagination as fodder when I masturbate.